Second Dessert

Bad date stories to tell my kids one day

2011-02-02T16:28:00.000-08:00

Good times #1

My good friend set me up a few months ago with one of his friends. After an awkward dinner he invited me to play games at his house. While driving to his house he explained to me that he is a night security guard, so he would need to change into his uniform because he was going straight to work after dropping me off at the end of the date. He then said, "Although I'm sure you wont mind because girls like a guy in uniform ;)" GAG ME. We got to his house where he gave me a complete tour of his house including his alphabetized dvd collection and food storage. My favorite part was the excessive amount of vinal lettering all over the house. When I asked about it, he told me that his former girlfriend had taught him how to do it. Odd? Maybe it's just me. After playing games, he changed into his "uniform" and said "don't worry I'm not wearing my gun belt, I didn't want to scare you." I smiled and secretly rolled my eyes.

Good times #2

I happened to sit next to this guy in sacrament meeting one Sunday. The next Sunday he walked up as I was talking to a friend and gave me a note. The note had his name and number and said "maybe we can get together sometime." I decided what the heck and sent him a text. He ended up asking me out for the next Friday. He picked me up, and between my house and the restaurant he told me his entire life story. It went a little like this. "So, I went on a mission, but came home to Flordia early because I was sick. While living at home I got in a really bad car accident where the person in the other car died. I decided to go to school at BYU but because I was so depressed about the accident I gained 300 pounds, stopped going to school and became inactive. I moved back to Flordia, had gastric bipass surgery and lost the weight. Loosing the weight gave me more confidence so I started sleeping around with girls. But don't worry I'm active in the church now." I pretty much wanted to open the door and jump out. The icing on the cake came while we were at dinner. I mentioned that I had five younger brothers who happened to be taller than me. He looked at me for a second and then said, "wow they must be tall because you're a big girl." I was drinking water when he said that and started choking. He then said, "Oh, sorry was that offensive?" HELLO! The rest of the date was thankfully uneventful, and I wasn't sad to see it end.

He got hitched!!!

2010-10-09T21:33:00.001-07:00

My little brother Neal got married yesterday. He married a wonderful girl (Rebecca), someone perfect for him. The wedding was perfect and the reception was a PARTY. What a wonderful day.

Camp Cherry Valley

2010-08-27T22:00:00.001-07:00

I spent the last three months on Catalina Island in CA working at Camp Cherry Valley.

Meeting new Friends + Beautiful Weather + the Ocean + Hundreds of Boy Scouts + the chance to Laugh every day = HAPPINESS

Just a picture

2010-05-13T08:14:00.000-07:00

Here is the picture of me with Fisher and Peggy (from 106.5) at the teacher awards dinner. The dinner was at Archibalds (such good food!) in Gardner Villiage. It was a wonderful experience. Thanks Mikey for coming with me!

It's official, I must be an adult

2010-05-10T14:22:00.000-07:00

I remember the days when my seemingly large, although realistically small tax return came in the mail. I bought "childish" things like clothes, or shoes, I may have even payed full price for a movie. This year I am an adult. How do I know this you ask, well. . . I spent my tax return on extreemly boring (yet useful) things like a new printer, fixing my sprinkle system, a garden hose and most importantly a lawnmower. Check out this little beauty. It is the Torro 20300T self-propelled lawnmover and it is guaranteed to start on the first pull (That was adult talk in case you were wondering). I wonder what fun things I will get to buy next year. ;)

Tender Mercies of the Lord

2010-05-10T14:15:00.000-07:00

Tender Mercy #1

Last Monday as I was preparing my students for the end of level test that they have to take, I became extremely frustrated. I felt that they hadn't retained any of the information that we had worked so hard on the whole year, and I was sure that I had done nothing to help them learn. The next day I received a phone call from the radio station 106.5. They told me that they had recently had a contest to recognize "teacher heroes." Hundreds of people had submitted nominations and out of all the nominations they chose 20 to receive the award. The man from the radio station told me that I had been nominated and chosen to be one of the 20. At that moment the Lord was telling me that I was doing okay, that I was making an impact on my students (as small as it was).

Tender Mercy #2

During the same week, I had a "pity party moment" where I let the thoughts that Satan tries to put into my head get to me. I was upset about not being married and having three children, about not being pretty enough, smart enough or good enough. I'm not sure why I let Satan get to me, but I sometimes do. During one of my classes, the principal and vice principal came into my classroom. They congratulated me for receiving the award and then proceeded to tell me that the art teacher was retiring and that they wanted me to take his place. They told me that they were worried that the art program was dying and that they were confident that I would be able to inspire students to love art and build the program. Long story short, next year I will be teaching math on A days, and art on B days. This has been something that I have wanted since I took my first art class in college. Something that I didn't think I would ever be good enough to do, but that I really wanted. After they left, I sat at my desk and listen to the Lord tell me that I was good enough, and talented enough and that even though I wasn't married with three children that it was okay. He told me that it is all about timing and learning/growing along the way.

Out of the mouth of a high school student

2010-04-16T10:36:00.001-07:00

Today during class I tood a quick break to show my students this funny blog post. I thought is was funny, but two boys in my class thought that it was lame. They said, and I quote "Ms. Johnson where did you find this website? (said very sarcastically) Maybe this is why you aren't married. Instead of looking at stupid blogs shouldn't you be spending your time on E-Harmony?"

I fell back in my chair laughing.

Diaries of a High School Math Teacher

2010-04-01T15:33:00.000-07:00

I know I've said this before, but I love my job. Here are just a few of this weeks highlights.

1) Layton high school just got a new principal which means new policies and programs. One of the new policies is that student are not to be in the hall for any reason without a hall pass. I usually let my students have a drink break half way through the class, but because of the new policy I've had to stop. Three of my students (all boys) came to me with a diagram mapping out exactly how they were going to get to the drinking fountain without being caught. The diagram included ninja rolls, secret spy moves and a plan B (just in case). With a plan like that I had to let them go. Three minutes later, two of the three boys came running into the classroom. "Ms. Johnson we're so sorry, but we got caught. Mr. Gochberg (the assistant principal)said that we are going to get truencies, and that he is going to come talk to you about following the hall pass policy." "Where is Chris (the third boy)?" I asked, "Oh, he ran and hid in the bathroom." Are you kidding me...it was a drink break for heavens sake...doesn't the assistant principal have better things to do them get mad at students for getting a drink...ahhh! Five minutes passes, Chris comes back, but no Mr. Gochberg. 10 min...15 min...no Mr Gochberg. By this time I have figured out in my head exactly how I'm going to convince Mr. Gochberg not to give these boys truencies. 20 min...and then the bell rings. As these three boys leave one says, "Ms. Johnson, we were just kidding." ... Man I am gullible.

2) Today I gave a test on probability. The symbol "!" in math is called a factoral which means that you multiply a number by every number less than it until you get to zero. For example 5! is 5 x 4 x 3 x 2 x 1. As I was sitting at my desk one boy came up to me and said, "Ms. Johnson, I think there is a typo on number 5. All it says is forteen!!!!!(said with an excited inflection of his voice). I looked at him and thought "is he kidding...he must be kidding...wow, I think he's serious." All I could say is "no, it's not a typo, retake test will be available after spring break"...Oh, goodness :)

Two of my favorite people

2010-04-01T15:09:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite people, Ben Denzer, just had his 24th birthday. He is one of those friends that I'm certain the Lord put in my life to help me. It's funny how he knows exactly what to say to help me keep things in perspective and make me smile. Man I love that guy!!!! To celebrate we went to the Michael Buble concert. It was amazing! He is honestly better live then on CD. The best part of the whole night was seeing all of the 40 year old women standing in the front row screaming "I love you Michael." One day that will be me :)

I love this quote!

2010-03-28T21:14:00.000-07:00

"Make up your mind to be happy, even when you don’t have money, even when you don’t have a clear complexion, even when you don’t have the Nobel Prize. Some of the happiest people that I know have none of these things the world insists are necessary for satisfaction and joy. Why are they happy? I suppose it’s because they don’t listen very well. Or they listen too well to the things their hearts tell them. They glory in the beauty of the earth. They glory in the rivers & the canyons & the call of the meadowlark. They glory in the love of their families, the stumbling steps of a toddler, the wise and tender smile of the elderly. They glory in honest labor. One thing I know for certain: the time we have here goes by far too quickly. Don’t waist any more time.”

-Elder Joseph B Worthlin

Sweethearts dance

2010-02-16T19:51:00.001-08:00

I'm the sophomore officer adviser and in charge of the Sweethearts dance. This year the dance, decorations and turnout was bigger than ever. Thanks to help from so many people everything turned out wonderfully!!! These are my Sophomore officers. They're wonderful!!!!

Dancing like its 1999. I have no idea what I'm doing.

Morgan, me and Shaun.

My family

2010-01-30T11:26:00.000-08:00

Here is the most recent family picture. It was taken about a month ago right before Kevin left for his mission to Chicago. I pretty much LOVE my family! They were taken by Adrian.

This is a picture of my and the boys (minus Dallin). This is after winning the dodge ball silver metal at a dodge ball tournament. The other teams didn't stand a chance (all except that winning team that is)

This one is for Mickelle

2010-01-25T13:23:00.000-08:00

My list of pet peaves is pretty short. When I say short, I mean it, I think there are 2 things on the list. Most things don't really bother me. Yesterday after a very insightful converstation with my friend Mickelle (okay it really wasn't insightful) I decided that what I am about to mention was worthy of being added to the list.

Just in case you care, or more for the sake of me remembering what the other two pet peaves were let me tell you.

1. Boys that wear white socks with black pants and black dress shoes. ( I actually remind my students before a dance that this is not acceptable. I have been known to do sock checks when chaperoning. Don't judge me)

2. When two lanes murge into one on the freeway during construction and some "too good to follow the rules" car drives all the way to the front and them expects someone to let him in. (Yes I know this was a run on sentence, which is probably one of your pet peaves. Sorry)

Okay, here it is. . .#3 . . .Facebook PDA. You know what I'm talking about. Here are a few status examples:

"I love my husband sooooo much xoxoxoxoxox"

"Today I spent the best day ever with my Bobby Bo Bo"

"I miss my hunny buns so much. I can't wait to see him tonight"

How does someone coment to something like that? ...uh.......I miss your hunny buns too.... Who the heck is Bobby Bo Bo? Is it rude to just write "gag" (probably huh?)

Okay maybe it's just me. Maybe one day I will secretly love that someone is telling the world that he loves his Stephy weffy (FYI if anyone ever called me that, I might throw up).

What are your thoughts? Is facebook PDA okay? Do I just not understand how great it is and am missing out? Let me know.

P.S. Mom, I promise that I'm not bitter ;)

I love this kid!!!

2010-01-23T19:29:00.000-08:00

Here is a random picture of me and Dallin. He's the greatest!!!!!

Christmas in Mexico

2009-12-30T22:49:00.000-08:00

This year for Christmas, my family went on a cruise to Mexico. We went to Kobo San Lucas, Mazatlan, and Puerto Viarta. It was AMAZING. The highlights of the trip were snorkeling, parasailing, and zip lining. It was also wonderful to spend Christmas Eve reading the Christmas story as a family in our small room on the cruise ship. Here are a few pictures.

The last few months in a nutshell

2009-11-22T12:24:00.000-08:00

Summer Time: My summer break was Full!!! So full, that I don't remember everything that happened. I was an EFY councilor for a week, went to California, Adrian got married and my mom and I flew out to Seattle for the weekend to go to the reception and go sight seeing. Being a teacher and having a three month vacation definitely has it's benefits!!!

The new school year:

I have amazing classes this year. I teach algebra II honors and Pre-calculus honors. My students are so self motivated and they make me laugh every day! I'm also the sophomore officer adviser, and this year my officers are CRAZY! (a good crazy that is). I have a feeling that this is going to be the best teaching year so far.

My officers and me with our killer float for the homecoming parade.

Halloween with Dallin

Oh, and I bought a house. I have two cute roommates, and I'm finally all moved in.

Here are just a few pictures...

The dining room

The living room

The bathroom

My bedroom

Greece and Turkey

2009-06-22T10:18:00.000-07:00

My cute friend Rebecca and I decided to go on a two week tour of Greece and Turkey. It was AMAZING. Pictures definitely don't do what I saw justice, but here are just a few of the hundreds that I took.

The Parthenon.

The spice market and the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul were my favorite part of the whole trip. It was a shoppers paradise!!!

This is Hagia Sophia in Turkey. Inside is even prettier than the outside.

The island of Mykonos. Another one of my favorites.

Here is the story behind the three pictures above. We went to the house that Mary, the mother of Jesus, spent the last few years of her life (so they say...). Anyway, it is tradition for people to write down wishes and prayers on small pieces of paper and then put them on the wall asking Mary for help. I of course asked Mary for a husband. A little sacreligious I know, but thought it was hilarious. I can use all the help I can get ;)

The last place that we visited was Santorini. All of the buildings were blue and white. It was BEAUTIFUL. Better than I had imagined from seeing pictures in a book or in the movies.

The whole trip was an adventure. The perfect way to spend my 25th birthday.

Things you hear in high school

2009-06-22T10:06:00.000-07:00

I was walking out of school a few weeks ago and this is the conversation that I heard between a guy and a girl...

Guy: Hey so I heard that Bobby got stabbed. Is he aight?

Girl: Yah, it wasn't too bad, he's aight.

As I walked to my car I couldn't help but laugh. I knew that I should have been concerned about this Bobby kid who got stabbed, but all I could think about was that "aight" was now a commonly used word. I think that I may start incorporating it into my vocabulary. Who knows, I might start using "wuz up," or "for dizzle" too.

Go ahead, call me Ms. Stephanie Johnson M. D.

2009-05-06T16:06:00.000-07:00

Last Monday I graduated with my masters from National University (I know I know, it sounds phony, but it's for real). I was able to do all of my classwork on-line and I finished 10 classes/40 credits in a year. It was crazy, but now that it's over, it was so worth it!! Here are a few pictures from the graduation ceremony.

Vain I know, but I loved that I got to wear a blue sash

Me and Adrian.

Aren't my parents great!

I love this picture of Dallin and me

The season for weddings

2009-04-29T18:37:00.001-07:00

One of my favorite companions got married in the Mt. Timpanogas Temple. I'm super excited for her.

Me and my adorable cousin Kim at our cousin Chris's wedding. Kim and her wonderful husband Robert live in Texas, and I love when they come to visit.

So one last thought.

2009-02-01T21:43:00.000-08:00

Wow, I don't post in five months and now, I can't stop. I keep thinking that I'm done and then I have another thought. Here it goes....I LOVE MY JOB. I feel like this picture shows exactly how much I love it. I love going to work every day, and I always come home with crazy stories. Here's one of my favorite.

Last week I ran into one of my students in the hall. He stopped me and told me that he had something great to tell me. This is the conversation.

Juan: Ms. Johnson, you should probably know that I posted you on my Myspace page as one of my hero's

Me: Really? Wow thanks.

Juan: Yah, I wrote that you were the best F'n math teacher ever.

Me: Uh.. Juan did you use F'n or did you write down the whole word?

Juan: I used the whole thing! (This was said with a big smile, proud of his quality use of the F word)

Me: Uh.. Thanks Juan that was really nice. (I wasn't sure if I should be offended or complimented. I think it was a complimented...Yah pretty sure it was a compliment)

This my friends is why I LOVE MY job. Where else could the F word be a compliment.

This story I just had to tell

2009-02-01T21:26:00.000-08:00

So.... I know Halloween was three months ago, but I thought this picture was worth showing. Adrian and I dressed up as Polygamist wives, it was GREAT! We found matching denim dresses at DI, poofed up our hair, I made myself look preganant and Adrian had a unibrow. Lets just say that if the ward party that we went to would have had a constume contest, we would have been in the running for the gold. It was probably my faviorite Halloween so far.

It only seems fair

2009-02-01T21:06:00.000-08:00

So I finally came to the grips with the fact that I'm a "blog stocker." It's true! It only seems fair that if I stock other people through their blogs, I should probably update mine more than once every five months so that people can "blog stock" me too.

I thought about filling everyone in on what has happened the last five months, but that would just be boring. I'm starting fresh. This is a picture of me, my roomate Adrian and my brother Neal. We went to a BYU basketball game. It was great (except for the fact that they lost), but I got to pretend to be a die hard basketball fan and I did a pretty good job of faking my way through the BYU fight song. I definitely need more practice though. Thanks for letting us come down and see you Neal!!!!

Hiking in Adams Canyon

2008-07-26T21:34:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago Adrian and I hiked up Adams Canyon in Layton. The waterfall at the top was beautiful!!! To bad that we didn't have our swim suits.

Am I sure about this..

2008-06-22T20:47:00.000-07:00

Don't ask me why, but I decided to join LDS singles. It was one of those crazy things that I did after turning 24. Adrian sent me that scary picture to try to convince me it was a bad idea. I'm not married yet (it's only been a week), but it has been a very entertaining experience. Where else could you meet people with great screen-names like Loveisnow, babycakes82, teddybear1299, topnotchldsguy, singlevagabond, unblvbl, blingblingRM, eternityatstake (this one is my favorite). Man, I thought my screen-name stephanieann84 was original, but obviously I need to step it up.

Things get even more exciting when you get to send someone a "virtual flirt." Obviously the amateurs start small sending small things like "hi", or maybe a "smile, " but the pros use the the big stuff like "you're cute" or "wink-wink." I'm sure that you can tell by now that sending the right flirt to the right person is not easy and comes with lots and lots of practice. Who knows maybe one day I'll get a "let's meet." I can only dream!

While I am waiting for my own personal You've Got Mail love connection to happen, I will just have to entertain myself reading great profiles like this one.....(read the highlighted parts, they're my favorite) No joke this is someones real profile. He sounds like a winner!!!!!

----TOP TEN REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD GO OUT WITH ME----
10. If we get married and i die, you get to keep all my stuff.
9. The resurrection doesn't mean much to me - I've already got the perfect body, I'm just waiting on my glory.
8. I need someone to help me through life. My ADD is getting so bad that sometimes i can't finish a sentence without
7. I'm an eagle scout, i'm safe, and moms like me. On our dates, i'll even give you a complimentary can of mace to make you feel comfortable.
6. On my mission, i baptized a Jehovah's Witness missionary. (C'mon, you have to admit that is pretty cool. That has to count for something).
5. My mom says i'm a catch.
4. If you reject me, i'll get depressed, develop an eating disorder, die and come back as a ghost and haunt you and moan every time you try to use the restroom.
3. I'M THE BAG OF CHIPS! I have a motorcycle, drive a convertible, i played college football, and i'm working towards a 6 figure career. (i know what all you women really want deep down)
2. You know that diamond in the rough you've been looking for? That one perfect guy amongst all of these online losers? Well guess what? I MET HIM! And he taught me some way cool stuff.
1. Im an all around great guy! just ask my parole officer.

Hey, I'm more than just a pretty face! I'm also a student in Borem (Orem) Utah and i like hanging out, having fun and meeting people. Summer is here and i wanna get out and have fun but need to meet someone cool. Ive decided to swallow some serious pride and try this online thing. If it worked for one of my best friends, it can work for me. So if you wanna do something sometime, give me a shout. I'm easy going and pretty much get along with anyone, even democrats. Intelligent and adventurous people preferred, no Yankees fans or i'll stab you.
To tell you more about myself: I'm 6' 250 pds. and spend too much, yet not enough time in the gym. Blonde hair, brown eyes. You wouldn't guess but i can run very very fast. I am very religious and have a sincere side but don't always wear my religion on my sleeve (at least not online). I found thee coolest career on the planet and am working towards that. If we get married, i'll be able pay for all the dumb pairs of shoes you want. Really, go nuts.
My hobbies are pretty simple: anything fun and active especially when they're with friends. I play football, basketball, softball, volleyball and indoor soccer. I somehow enjoy country swing dancing. Also, intelligent conversation is awesome fun. - (the jock part of me and the nerd part of me often times quarrel. The jock part usually shoves the nerd part in the trash can.) BUT above all i love my family, friends and i love meeting new people.
What i'm lookin for: someone who is LAID BACK and wants to have fun tomorrow more then they want to get married by tomorrow. Someone with no children and never married. Someone intelligent and fun and who cares more about people than social protocol.
Sorry I'm not better looking. We can go on dates in the dark if you want.

I know what you're thinking....WHY? It's just too entertaining not to.

Confession.... I love rodeos

2008-06-22T20:04:00.000-07:00

Last week my family (Adrian included) and I went to the National High School Rodeo in Heber. Every year before the “real” rodeo the community puts on a smaller rodeo for kids with special needs. My little brother Dallin got to rope a metal calf, ride a horse and get his picture taken with the rodeo queen. Dallin was pretty much the cutest cowboy ever.

Okay, so here is the confession part. I LOVE RODEOS. I think that I have a little bit of country in me. I told my dad that I was deprived as a child because I never got to be a rodeo princess. He just laughed at me. To humor me, he gave me a cowboy hat. It's not quite rodeo queen quality, but I was excited about it.

At the rodeo I ran into one of my favorite people in the world. His name is Brigham and he is a student at Layton High School. He loves Donald Trump, so at school he walks down the hall telling people that they are either hired or fired. I can't talk to him without smiling. When he saw me he said "Johnson, you look sexy." Talk about a self esteem boost!

The Big 24

2008-06-22T19:52:00.000-07:00

Thanks to a lot of friendly encouragement, I decided that now that I'm officially 24, I should probably have a blog. I'm not sure how exciting it will be, but I'll try to dig deep and post about the good stuff. So, about the blog title...living with my roommate Adrian, I have been introduced to some of the better things of life, one of them being Second Dessert. It is the dessert that you have after first dessert. It probably isn't very healthy, but it definitely is worth it (kind of like reading my blog).